Twenty Seventeen Reflections

With five days left of 2017, this might be a little early to do my reflections, but I highly doubt anything is going to happen in this weird period between Christmas and New Year, when no one really knows what day it is, so here we go.

2017 has been the best and worst year. The most surprising year which has come with the most change. I had my heart broken, I began a placement year, I ran a half marathon, and I found someone new. All things that I never thought would happen.
1)    IT IS OKAY TO MOVE ON. This is definitely the biggest thing I have learnt this year. There is a lovely quote by Rupi Kaur that I can relate to more than anything – “I feel apprehensive cause falling into you means falling out of him and I had not prepared for that”. I felt guilty and like I was betraying all I had convinced myself to be true over the last four years, but it was not betrayal, it was doing what was best for me. It was starting again and hugging happy memories goodbye.
2)    I can do what I set my mind to. When I told my dad I was going to run the Birmingham half marathon, his first words were “you’ll never do it”. But then I went and bought some new trainers. And then I was training three to four times a week. I ran 5 miles, then 8 miles, then 10 miles. And then I ran 13.1 miles. I’m not being dramatic when I say blood, sweat and tears went into the training. There were blisters and shin splints, and tears whilst struggling to run 6 miles because I thought I would never be able to run 13.1. But I did it and smiled the whole way round. It was the most insane experience and I can’t wait to do it again in Liverpool.
3)    TAKE YOUR BLOODY MEDICATION! This is something I have really struggled this year. To be honest, I haven’t been on Citalopram properly since June, despite still being prescribed it. I don’t know what I find so difficult about taking it every day. 1 pill a day – how hard is that? The first couple of months off it was okay because some was still in my system, but this convinced me I was okay and didn’t need it. But as time went on, it’s meant my moods are a rollercoaster, huge highs crashing to lows, in way they haven’t been since before I started on Citalopram. My new year’s resolution is to stick at it, and I’ve taken it every day for the past week, which is good for me lately.
4)    Life after uni is fab! Though I haven’t graduated yet, I’m doing a placement year, so am kind of getting the experience now in full-time work. And I love it! Every weekend I’m visiting friends doing placements around the country, and a Christmas without revision is INCREDIBLE. I love my job and it’s made me even more motivated to go into PR/Communications. The thought of going back to uni is terrifying as I can’t remember anything of what I originally planned to do in third year, but hey ho!

2018 will be better.

  • Take Citalopram every day
  • Liverpool Half Marathon 
  • Find a dissertation topic (oh god)

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